[MiNT] various OS

[Martin-Eric Racine <q-funk@pp.fishpool.fi>]

This came on a French mailing list.  Below is my English version.
It's completely off-topic, but quite hilarious.  Enjoy!  Q-Funk


Air DOS

All passengers push the plane until it starts to fly, then they
jump onboard and let it glide until it falls down. They get out
of the plane and start all over again.


Mac Airlines

All flight attendants, check-in clerks and luggage carriers have
the exact same face and clothes.  You get into the the plane
without realizing it and once inside, you notice there is no
window so you are not quite sure if you made it there. There is
no vibration during takeoff or landing.  In fact, you're still
not aware that you're inside a plane and that it's already
flying.  Every time you ask a question about the flight's
details, you are politely reminded that you don't need to know,
you don't even wanna know and that everything will be handled
without you being aware of it. Therefore, please don't bother
asking.


Windows Air

The airport is really nice and colourfull.  The flight attendants
are really friendly.  The luggage check-in procedure is really
straightforward.  The takeoff is outstanding.  After about 15
minutes, the plane explodes without warning.


Windows NT Air

The service is similar to Windows Air, except the ticket is
more expansive, the planes are much bigger and when they explode,
every plane within a 80km radius is blasted too.


UNIX Airways 

Each passenger brings a piece of the plane to the airport. All
passengers then proceed to the runway and start assembling the
plane, while constantly arguing about what type of plane they
should build.  Then, one of the passengers is designated as the
pilot and proceeds towards the the cockpit, where manuals that
describe the plane in every detail are found.  However, there are
no piloting instructions, so the plane remains grounded.


Linux Air

This company was founded by unhappy employees from all the other
airlines.  They build their own planes, their own check-in
counters and pave the runways themselves.  The ticket is a real
bargain, as it only covers the printing price.  You could also
download the ticker yourself and print it at home. Once onboard,
you are handed four bolts and a toolbox, along with a guide
called seat-assembly.html.  Once you have managed to install your
seat, it turns out to be completely adjustable and extremely
comfortable.  The flight leaves and arrives on time and without
any incident.  The meals are very light and quite nutritious.  
When you try to explain to the folks that you traveled for free
on a luxury plane, they stare at you like you were an idiot and
scream "YOU MEAN YOU ACTUALLY HAD TO INSTALL YOUR OWN SEAT?!!"

-- 
Martin-Éric Racine  http://funkyware.atari.org/  Atari TT030 FAQ
Lappeenranta, Finland.  Surfing on a Intel/Microsoft-free GEM OS